By BARRY CARTER STAR-LEDGER STAFF Scot Anthony Robinson's gateway drug into addiction was marijuana. He was an 11-year-old boy looking for acceptance, viewing himself through others' eyes when he took that first puff of "weed." In high schools in Montreal, Pennsylvania and Colorado, Robinson added alcohol to the mix. This was his "chemical courage," his "liquid fuel." It would help to remove social inhibitions and fear of doing hard-core drugs during the 1980s as a theater student at the State University of New York at Purchase, he believed. By the time he was 31, Robinson, an actor who had been in notable films like "New Jack City," "Mo Better Blues," "Malcolm X" and "Jungle Fever," was a homeless heroin and crack cocaine addict wandering the streets of New York City, talking to himself. His addiction made him unrecognizable to family and friends. In one year, he lost 60 pounds, tipping the scale at 123. He was so skinny, he dressed in five layers of clothing to cover the skeleton he had become. Robinson is clean now. Has been for nine years. In that time, he has been sharing his story of redemption from addiction, using it to touch the lives of middle and high school students and youths incarcerated in correctional facilities across the country. He succeeded again last week with students at West Kinney Alternative School in Newark. Robinson took them on a two-hour voyage into his abyss, where he explored peer pressure, fear, self-esteem and relationships, all issues that impact teens. "It's a complete miracle that I'm alive," Robinson said. "Upon realizing that, I decided to do something positive from a negative journey." The presentation, dubbed Vision Warrior, was theatrical, confrontational and, at times, comical, with Robinson tapping into his acting skills and life experiences to probe, then pinpoint the reasons America's youth yield to the seductions of drugs. "We need more guys like him," said Al-Laquan Brown, 17. "I was feeling him. It helps to have someone make you realize there are more important things than drugs." West Kinney was the third school he visited in Newark this year. The theatrical lecture-presentation was sponsored by United Parcel Service, which learned of Robinson through one of his segments he did with Partnership for a Drug-Free America. Robinson will visit nine more Newark schools next school year. Students from West Kinney think he'll make an impact with their peers as he did with them during his performance and in small group sessions afterward. "There are a lot of kids that can relate to what he's saying and won't speak up," said Joe Esposito, 16. "I think it's good that he's spending time to talk with us, because there are a lot of people who won't do that." Robinson told the students it is important for them to deal with pressures of life and not use drugs as an outlet to escape from problems. "You've got to feel your loneliness, you've got to deal with your frustration, your anger, your pain, your heartache," he said. "Everyone in this room is going to go through the trials and tribulations, the storms of life." He said their development as teens is like constructing a vessel. The sails represent self-esteem, character, discipline, responsibility, mental toughness and emotional stability. If young people are not equipped, Robinson said they might turn drugs to hide feelings and problems that do not go away until they are addressed. "You can push your feelings deep down into the bowels of your vessel, but they don't go anywhere," he said. "Like salt water eats away at the ocean shore, they (feelings) eat away at the true essence of who you are." Robinson, the product of an interracial marriage, told the students he didn't express his emotions. As a youth, he grew up in several places - Colorado, Pennsylvania and Montreal - and classmates in each place rejected him because of his light-skinned complexion. "If I walked into a black school, they called me whitey," he said. "If I walked into a white school, they called me nigger." He said his dad tried to instill the teachings of Martin Luther King Jr., that people should judge others by the content of their character, not by the color of their skin. "Intellectually, I could appreciate it, but when I walked into that school, people dogged me, people hated on me, people messed with me. Right from the get-go, I was wounded." So he smoked marijuana to be accepted, because those who did were respected. In high school, he drowned his insecurities with alcohol and hung with a rough crowd that attached its masculinity to drinking. To belong, Robinson said he drank to prove he was hard, confident and cool. "Your thoughts create your feelings, which determine your behavior," he said. Robinson said he ratcheted his addiction up to cocaine in college, then heroin while trying to get his acting career off the ground in New York City. He had been in videos, movies, soap operas and television dramas, but his addiction to heroin had reached $30 a day. Robinson said he pursued roles in Los Angeles, around the time of the riots in 1992. He had worked with actors such as Edie Falco of "The Sopranos" and Wesley Snipes, who starred in some of the same movies that he had roles. When he returned to New York, his $30 a day habit had reached $200 and his girlfriend had kicked him out of their apartment.With nowhere to go, he sold drugs to support his habit and lived on the street. "Drugs did the exact opposite of what I thought they would do," Robinson said. "I thought they would make you more stronger, more powerful, more sexy, more cool, more creative. They took me, and my beautiful vessel became a slave ship, a slave ship, a slave ship." After he landed in a hospital, sick from infection, Robinson said he spent two years in a therapeutic community repairing his vessel and creating Vision Warrior to help youths stay away from drugs.